I hate showering. Sure, it makes your hair smell nice and rids your body of that horrific natural odour.
But I hate it. I hate being completely exposed and freezing before you get into the shower. I hate running out of soap. I hate standing for long periods of time. I hate finding conditioner still in your hair half-way through the day. And I hate when the water turns from scorching hot to Canadian winter cold.
But there is a point to this monotonous every-day activity: it permits us to be somewhat presentable in public.
Reality check: Grooming is overrated. Sometimes we don’t necessarily have to follow the rules from our Grade 5 health class.
As a student at St. Thomas University, we all know if you don’t dress to the nines Monday through Friday, you’ll be forever exiled to the outskirts of the Vanier parking lot. STU is overflowing with fabulous dressers in their boots and leggings, alongside their button up shirts and boot cut jeans. JDH is filled with flawless haircuts, impeccable make-up and freshly cleansed bodies.
We hardly ever wear sweatpants and hoodies with our university logo – unlike our friendly neighbour down the hill. Instead, we dress up as though we’re off to a job interview at Vogue magazine. Our colleagues can see our berets from a mile away.
But sometimes we slip – and not just in the shower.
In my first year of university, I definitely had a few falls. Most of the time I would wake up 10 minutes before class – or 10 minutes after it had already begun. I would whip on my grey newsboy hat and apply make-up over yesterday’s.
I wore the same orange hoodie I slept in that night and sometimes forgot to take off my pyjamas altogether.
Over the years, friends have told me rather than showering in the morning, they spray themselves with perfume or cologne. Instead of washing their hair after the gym, they blow dry the sweat particles that sit on their scalp. When they run out of clean clothes and don’t have time to do a load of laundry, they go commando to school and wear the same pair of socks for days. Rather than shampoo, they’ll put baby powder in their hair so it doesn’t look greasy. As opposed to washing their t-shirts, the obvious solution is to go out and buy new ones. And brushing their teeth before class is an afterthought.
I get it. As university students, we have to prioritize. And sometimes, getting an A comes at the cost of avoiding the shower for four days. The person sitting beside you in class may not appreciate your lack of hygiene, but your GPA certainly will.
Just remember, sprinkling yourself with water from the sink in the morning does, in fact, count. Last week’s clothes found at the bottom of your dirty laundry basket can be acceptable. And a vacation from your shower once in a while is okay too – as long as you don’t get caught. And if you don’t agree, then you’ve never gotten soap in your eyes while in the shower before.
