Brandi Gray usually starts the day around 7:30 a.m., and always ends up at work by 8 a.m. Gray works at Greener Village, where they spend most of the day in the office talking to company executives about fundraising and donations.
Gray’s nights are booked with trips to the gym, social activities, and working on their masters. Gray is quite possibly one of the busiest people you’ll meet, but they’re also so much more then that.
Gray’s life was a lot of work and little fun. They spend up to 40 hours a week working, 20 plus hours modeling, 10 hours a week being a full-time student until recently. Gray wanted to get everyone up to speed on how they felt about who they were. Gray who keeps their real name and identity very private wanted to tell fans about the real Brandi Gray.
In a Facebook post to their friends and fans in July of 2015, Gray came out as genderqueer and goes under ‘they” pronouns.
“From a young age I’ve felt distinctly not female. When I was child it was easy to accept. Adults don’t really give too much thought to what pre-pubescent kids do, and whatever I did was easy to explain,” said Gray. “I was just a girl who liked to play with the boys, who didn’t play like a girl, and who was by all accounts a tomboy.”
Gray considered the post mostly just a way to bring their friends, family and fans all up to speed on Gray’s personal life. Most of their Facebook friends who viewed the post were touched by Gray’s sentiment and courage. Gray inspired them.
“Any social theorist would agree that gender is a categorization game, and I’m refusing to play, essentially. I didn’t expect the wave of support that I received and honestly thought that people might ignore it all together.”
Modeling was a huge part of Gray’s life since she was sixteen and for a very long time so was being genderqueer. It has made them much more aware of how social media can play a big role in ones life. Gray said keeping up with that was a difficult task.
Most of all Gray wanted friends and fans to know that identifying as a genderqueer person had nothing to do with their decision to quit modeling.
“I had originally decided to continue modeling after my post but then realized that it wasn’t something I was interested in doing anymore,” said Gray.
Gray had simply lost their passion for modeling, though did admit they miss the financial stability it provided. Gray was able to travel more and the income was steadier than it is now.
“I’m much happier now that I have stopped modeling and I wouldn’t trade my happiness for anything. There was no creativity in the kind of modeling I was doing, so it didn’t feel worth it outside the money.”
Despite that, Gray said if and when they return to modeling, they’ll practice more artistic styles of modeling.
In a life where Gray juggles philanthropy, bartending life, and social activities like the sorority, Gray is now able to enjoy the smaller things in life more now then ever. For that Gray is thankful.
“Now that I’ve freed up a substantial amount of my time I’m able to rest and be creative. I love painting and creating things, masks especially, and I have time to do it now. Eventually I’d like to move into fashion design and make creative clothing but we’ll see what happens.”
Gray is unbelievably happy by the support they’ve received in the past months, and hopes that this will help others along the way.
“Now that I’ve left the industry I realize just how badly it affected me and how damaged some areas of my life are. I’m seeing a therapist about my gender issues and we’re uncovering a lot of damage that has been done throughout my career. I’m definitely motivated in my life and I’m much happier with the quality of social interaction that I have with family and friends.”
