Cousins with her students in Ghana (Courtesy Kara Cousins)
Student goes abroad to teach, but learns her own life lessons along the way
“Blerfono, blerfono,” the sea of children yelled in my direction as I walked through the dusty village that would become my home.
The eyes of the villagers were continuously glued to the ‘white girl’ and the hushed tones of their local dialect faintly echoed in the air as I passed. I was under a microscope being examined. I was an outsider, an ‘other’, an alien in a foreign land. When I went in May to teach for three months I desperately wanted to blend in. I hated the feeling of being on the outside of a beautiful culture. For weeks I struggled with my identity and my reason for even being in Ghana. When I moved to my village, Agbenygakope, I allowed myself to let the negatives blur my vision and really dampen my spirits. In the beginning most of my smiles were faked. My efforts to immerse myself into the culture left a lot to be desired. I resented hearing the world blerfono. I was digging myself a hole of unhappiness and self pity.
Cousins with her friend Bright (Courtesy Kara Cousins)
One day I wallowed in what felt like hopelessness help came from an unexpected source one day. His name was Bright, a perfect name for him. I immediately knew there was something different about him, something special. He wore a smile that curved from ear to ear and he had eyes that radiated joy and happiness. He latched onto my hand and looked up into my eyes and we just stood in silence. He did not mention the color of my skin, or ask me for anything. We just stood as he attempted to make fish lips at me. I soon discovered that Bright had Down syndrome.
Having a mental or physical disability in such a rural village robs you of your humanity. You are considered a thing- inconvenience and not worthy of love or attention. There were several other people I met who have more severe disabilities than Bright does and they are shunned by society. They are referred to as crazy people who are forced to fend for themselves and put up with the endless ridicule of the locals. My heart broke when I saw these people. All I could see was a precious beauty within them. I was not in Ghana to create change. I was there to build relationships with people. However I found this difficult when there were so many barriers separating me from my family, my students, and the villagers. Bright was the first person who appeared to be oblivious to the lack of melanin of my skin. He began to break the barriers that had been holding me back from genuinely loving these people. It humbled me to see a child who has every right to be bitter, accept me and love me with no questions asked and no strings attached. Our friendship set into motion what would be the most amazing three months I have ever known.
As I became more comfortable and genuine within my village, my relationship with my family became intimate and amazing. I fetched water at the river, prepared meals, farmed, went to the market and just got to know my family in their everyday life. I became a sister, a daughter and a friend. The barriers that were once setbacks became doors of opportunity to become a role model for young girls oppressed by tradition, to be a white person who was not seen as superior, to love the unloved. I was at home. My heart was fully engaged as I lived in Ghana.
In those months away I learned that discovering beauty in the broken is an amazing opportunity. Many times I miss seeing beauty because I am too focused on negative. And because of the unconditional, selfless love that I was given and shown I left feeling and knowing that I had become a part of a beautiful and simplistic culture.
