The Aquinian

You’re lucky I like you: My love confession

Alyssa Mosher - From the Editor (Tom Bateman/AQ)

You know it’s over when the guy you’re seeing says, “You need to stop liking me.”

To be honest, I’ve never had the best luck when it comes to guys. Maybe it’s because I never really stopped crushing on Kristian Swan, my great unrequited Grade 7 love, until my last years of high school; or maybe it’s because I freaked out whenever “the nerd” couldn’t keep his eyes off me; or maybe I was just so messed up (parents’ divorce, low self-esteem) that by the time I hit puberty, I didn’t feel like giving anyone a chance.

And believe me, I’ve tried. But the timing always seemed a bit off.

Why didn’t anyone tell me dating a 28-year-old engineer at 19 wasn’t a good idea? We had fun; there was an obvious physical attraction – what more did we need?

I knew it was over when he bought his first condo and traded in his luxury Volvo for a Toyota Corolla.

Oh, and did I mention my Grade 7 crush went out with one of my good friends? That soon became a trend.I’ve never been “the other woman,” but when the guys broke up with their girlfriends, who was there to grovel at their feet? Well, me, of course.

One guy told me his ex-girlfriend was being nice to him again, so we couldn’t continue seeing each other. This was just after our first date – and my first date ever. That same guy was also my first kiss.

You’d think my experiences would make me the most cynical person ever – and I am in many respects.

But I have one confession to make: I’m a closet romantic.

***

It all began with The Notebook.

I never read the book, but the movie caught me off guard. I’d seen romantic characters before in every rom-com (the latest boy told me this means “romantic comedy”) available, but this couple was different.

Young Allie (Rachel McAdams) and Noah (Ryan Gosling) were in love and couldn’t help it. There was something very real about that. People can make fun of that famous kiss in the rain as much as they’d like, but who wouldn’t want to experience passion like that?

Love and Other Drugs is the latest favourite rom-com – and I think it will stay that way for a while. Some say it’s because Jake Gyllenhaal has a Kristian Swan-like appeal – dark hair, blue eyes – but I beg to differ.

Amongst the sex and nudity and drugs and illnesses in this movie, is a real story about two real – though utterly beautiful – people who don’t want to love, but can’t help it.

How awesome is that?

Yeah, I can say I’ve had the worst luck with guys, but I’ve recently also had something that was pretty great – though it did have to end.

There’s something about unexpectedly catching that person’s eye or even just sitting close to him or her on the couch in front of a warm fire; or discovering new things to do around town – or in-house. And for some reason, even after several dates, he or she still gives you butterflies.

I’ve never been in love – and the thought still terrifies me – but I think being a romantic is something I can warm up to.

Though romance may seem girlish and corny on its own, it’s pretty great when you have someone to share it with.

And I’m certainly over that embarrassing, immature, totally unrealistic and unrequited schoolgirl crush on Kristian Swan. Totally. That was so middle school.

Jake Gyllenhaal on the other hand…

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